And that's why you don't trust Google
And that's why you don't trust Google
Good dammit, man. Look, man, no one told me this information. Okay, did you? Did you know The Internet lies? Did I know that the internet law had lied to me? Isn't that how we ended up with the president before this one, I mean that. So we just go straight in to it. I like it. I like it just didn't because the meta, they got the information wrong, or they let the wrong and I don't quite know what happened. But I do remember that a very pale white man had to try to explain the Internet to older white men and women and it was the most hilarious interaction I've ever seen in my life. And they still just have a bunch of foolishness on it didn't do anything, but make for good memes. But you know, that's why the internet exists. Right? Right. Can see funny pictures and tiny squares? Well, we're on the internet. Are we without we were in my garage? Podcasting from my garage? Not from the internet, right? You know. My name is wills his head above hypocrisy and I live on Earth in my garage, not on the internet, not a virtual person. I'm a real person, unfortunately. Right? And Mark is and I just want to say you know that you'd rather live on the internet I get it. Sorry, destroyed, but like, oh, I mean, if I believed in the metal world in 1000 Social media, like if you believed in the metal world, you'd have more crypto. What I meant the whole new world to Facebook but a world Metta World Peace. You know, listen, go and drop your beautiful intro theme and explain the details about meta I've met I've played with him he's good. He's actually very nice. And for people that are wondering what the hell I'm talking about the internet lied to me it's probably lie to you bunch of times. Normally, I'm not skeptical or be very skeptical about things. You got to make sure your Google foo is on point otherwise you will get all sorts of incorrect results. Yeah, well, I'll let you know about the results. And I'll let the listeners know you have to search like water. Right? Isn't that what really no he didn't something like that somehow water? Um, you know, I'm gonna go look up the quote. I'll be right back. Bruce, Bruce will help you get through the internet. If not you just kick it real hard and restart it if you tried turning it on Yeah, it comes to find out we're both wrong. He said to be like, like water, search like water. But I blame that on him not having the internet. I feel like he would have he would have rephrased to make your Google searches more pinpoint needed. But I bet you Bruce would have been one of the best Google searches out there. I believe you will. Bruce would have told me that the internet was lying to me because I ran out. So look, I need to wash dishes. Okay, I'm sorry. You had to look up instructions on dishwashing. Follow along please. soap, water and a sponge and or rag. Right. So you need oil and you need dirty dish. Did you not have dishes? Did you think you know I have dishes but you know I'm a capitalist. So they don't do dishes? That's exactly so we use an automatic dishwasher. Oh, I thought you had a poor person. You know, I'm not that type of capitalist yet. So I decided to go ahead and load that automatic dishwasher. Without knowing that we didn't have any dish soap. Or you know, dish. Well, you just wasted dishes. No. So according to the internet, it said if you add three drops of dishwashing soap, like you know, the ones you use for hand washing dishes into the dishwasher. It should be fine. Even though the bottle clearly says Do not put an automatic dishwasher. Okay, so you read the warning and went with your Facebook results. Why don't have Facebook Google after seeing how the Internet affected the election you still trusted the internet packaging. If anybody knew how the soap would work the people that made it might have an idea. Well, maybe I mean, maybe you've never watched a sitcom before this is sitcom one on one like the seven year old gets asked to do the dishes, the worst in a laundry machine as well. And you know you miscalculate with the soap and now you have a foam party in your kitchen living room or wash area. It said three drops. Mm hmm. I am sure that what did the package on the soap say, that's neither here nor there. So after it's all the same for machine. Yeah. Do you still have this machine? I do. So I had to go get some spa down to calm it down. It's so what? Spa down? The anti foaming agent? Spa down? It's a common like Burke Williams, where you get to stone massages. I mean, yeah, I guess it's the same material. But yeah, no, you blew up the kitchen and then went and to the spa? No, not exactly. So I'm gonna just break the whole washing machine and then go again. I would have just washed the dishes with soap, water and a rag because I don't trust this washer in the first place. What's the point of having one? Because my wife dries it? Well, obviously he knows how to use it. I like the point being is yeah, there was suds everywhere. And clearly, I don't know why you you didn't need the internet for that that text message apps. But the bottle said not to do it. Right. Who thought that bottle would be rice. Why did they put the instructions right on the bottle. You don't have to send form. It's a pamphlet that comes separate. It's right there. So you pick it up and you know how to use it in your head. And you managed to use it incorrectly anyway. And it's just so good question all the time. I had people use things that have one purpose wrong. And you thank you for this example. It's because you just bypass the instructions on warning label. That's how the kid got capitated at Magic Mountain climbed over eight fences and seven warning signs. His favorite Red Hat Batman came swinging around poor girl kicked his head clean off, shattered her whole tibia fibia all that stuff she lived. Probably you know why? traumatized, but I stopped the machine. Okay, the next time you have the urge to not follow the instructions just think of the decapitated man and Magic Mountain is this worth my whole skull. I don't think it's worth my whole school. But it wasn't it's definitely not worth my security deposit. The point being I'm telling you this you effectively went and got a red hat over the caution side everything's your dishwasher kicked your head off. You're realizing there was some weird sounds coming from the dishwasher and an abundant of suds coming everywhere. I googled what to do in this situation. Yes, I asked the internet twice. So you had to google clean up. It didn't. Map is just a big text file that said clean and up. Explain to me how you would clean up sides from a dishwasher with a mop and a lot of towels. Okay, so you obviously wrote the article I read what's the point? You know, I've watched television before and I've seen children have bubble accidents. This is something that my children actually haven't even done yet. I can't believe that anyway but no I got my solution from like not home alone. What was the one with the dude in the fence and he never showed his face Home Depot I mean Home Improvement time to Tim Tim a time Taylor and yeah then he had the boy with the rename all the girls like Jonathan Taylor Tom there yep, it was I hated him so much. I mean so good. Well, yeah, gave him after I grew up it was didn't matter. Stop acting when I was an adolescent, right a podcaster now great, so he's gonna just come back and haunt me again. That touches your life. We just live in it. So yeah. I did use house I did use a mop to clean the floor up. You are using the internet in Korea. However. It didn't tell me how to get rid of the suds because once you start the machine over suds are coming out everywhere gets out of the machine. Yeah, I don't know water. Probably no, no, I have to go get spa down to hell is spot antifoaming agent. Okay, this is why you don't Google everything because I found that some people it's gonna pour a little bit in or spray it in, run the cycle a couple times. And then Bada bing bada boom, newest, just Washington room. How you doing? A man you said that. Like you solve this miraculous problem that you did not create yourself like that. This is very reminiscent of our previous administration. You're just celebrating solving your own part. You can't spill a glass of milk and then take three weeks to clean it up and then celebrate that you went and you know bought paper towels clean. Not if you spilled it you're supposed to clean and you're also not supposed to spill the milk because you're an adult and you should know how to operate a cup. Can I throw the paper towels into the ground? And why would you do that? Nobody saw me he Rancid Milk soaked paper towel said reminiscent of our old commander in chief I don't know if you've been noticing, but I get my news from Republicans rich Republicans daily.com I'm pretty sure even they know how to work a dishwasher. I'm sure someone's made mistake. Yeah. On television a mistake. No, no. I've had a dishwasher. My entire adult life. And this has not happened to me once. Well, you never looked up. You've never obviously ran out of dishwashing soap. Yes, I have. But the thing is, we also have a sink, right? So if we don't have the when we have, you know, the pods, right, we don't have the pods, right? Just use soap in the sink, right? Like a normal human being. Yeah, but I don't wash my dishes like a poor person. So then go buy paper plates. While you're at it, why don't you go buy more pods as opposed to flooding your entire kitchen if you just if you're determined to spend money, and you don't want to wash your dishes like a poor person, then go to Target and get yourself some pods so you don't flood your kitchen and have to go to the spa to get the soap out of the machine which still doesn't make any sense to make spa down. It's antifoaming it doesn't exist. It's not a thing. You went and got a massage and just waited for the soap to dry up. I got spa down, right? That's slang for I'm going to get a massage because I broke something. Which is normally what you know, the wife supposed to do. But I suppose you know, what's good for the goose is good for the gander. I yeah, I just don't like being sabotaged. So, I guess if I break something, I'm gonna go play basketball. I mean, it's that's, that's an option. Yeah, I mean, I would have gone and bought some hoop down since you went and got this body just making up words. But yeah, did you like did you ever ever look at something on the internet? It'd been wrong. Yeah, all the time. That's why I use my own brain combined with my internet. Don't blindly follow the internet. Don't follow me. You know? So you're like, Well, this time I'm gonna find it. Follow it. 100% to a tee right wrong off a cliff doesn't matter. Because the internet normally I follow television because that's what real that's much better. Well, it's with Ray's me. And it's made me and it's made you flood the kitchen because you decide unstable. If television raised you, you should have known better than to put dishwashing soap into your dish washer. They never really showed how it happens. They usually just show the machine start and then oh, no, and there's bubbles everywhere. Clearly, you were raised on different television because I have seen that exact problem happened dish soap. That's the only way you create that problem not because I'm the Brady Bunch of stuff where they add like tons of washing powder. But that's usually for the for the for washing machine. Yeah, right. Right. Right. If it's this if it's a dishwasher or sink, because there's of the soap in the dishwasher, because you're not ever supposed to do that because it explodes it is common sit comical knowledge. Yes. Since we're making up words, well, YouTube has ad set comical to your spa down, poop down. Make believe so magic dust or whatever you use to clean up your Yeah, not thankfully. But you just went to the spa and you came back. And it was cleaning. No, it doesn't work that way. Because if you run the machine without using spa down to calming down, it's just suds everywhere. Not if you flush it with water. The water if you a whole lot of water. Yeah, no, because water exists, right? But if I keep running the machine, that's a waste of water. Also, it's going to keep creating so like also now we want to save the environment. After we flood the kitchen. I get it. You get real conscious after you break everything. Wow, good order of operations. I felt like I had to do something. Right. Right. Right, you set off a new key Planetree everything's balanced. I understand. That makes total sense. i You 100% Are the Republican component of fish. I appreciate it. I think I can bring a nice balance in the show now. I mean, you know, during the the five passes we had I felt like I had to go find myself and I think I found yourself a Republican. That's fantastic. Well, you know, we all make mistakes. Yeah, yeah. 22,000 people actually made that mistake. I saw that comment, but some people were actually viewed in common what to do. We made the mistake of watching the video. They made a mistake of adding dish soap to their dishwasher. And I think they just watched the video. I don't think they actually did it. Have you ever fallen for anything on the internet? No, really? Nothing. I know that I mean, not a not a like a fact that wasn't accurate. It's a benefit of being a geriatric millennial, right like because I was born before and after the internet. I only trusted so much. I understand that it is a fantastic resource, a great tool, but it's not the end all be all right like if I got a power drill. That's fantastic. You can do a lot of things with a power drill. But you can't stand wood, right? Like if I need to stand a piece of wood and I take my power drill to it, I'm gonna have a problem. And I feel like that's the same. It's similar to when you just use the internet a for everything and follow and be follow it blindly. Same problem with religion, follow that blindly. Right? Like, that's a whole bunch of hearsay, in a book that was written, you know, 1000s of years, years ago. So with no updates, like forget the internet, like they didn't even have electricity. And this is what we're supposed to follow, you know, to a tee. Like, we don't even speak this, but the language is not the same. So I say that to say, there's nothing wrong with using tools or being religious. But there's also nothing wrong with critical thinking. You know, God gave us brains for a reason, if you believe in that. So use it, please. I did I believe that. I didn't mean use specific. Thinking like, you know, if it's good enough for dishes, it has to be good enough for the dishwasher. I'm sorry, what? If additional was good enough for dishes? Hands? But have you seen how dish soap works? And see this is this is problem you so rich, and so far removed from washing dishes? You know how soap works? No more. So yes, it's good enough for the dishes in a sink full of water outside of a pressurized dishwashing machine pressurized. That's right. See the Jets inside? It's, yeah, it's it's put, it's like putting too much soap in a carwash or something. Like, it just it's not a good idea. But you know, the internet is great. You just can't live by it. It can't be there. And it's because you know, I remember when you had to do research in like an encyclopedia or dictionary. Yeah. Or you had to hope that your parents, you know, better than C plus students. Otherwise you just don't get the answer, right? Like because you can't, if you don't have an encyclopedia, you don't have a dictionary and your parents are dumb, then you just don't get to know anything, you better hope they'd have they can follow directions to the library. Otherwise you go have a real misleading upbringing. Now, Jimmy's test right now, no matter how smart your parents are, you can just look up stuff on the internet, but But you have to make sure you're looking at the right things. That's why you got someone has to teach you critical thinking skills. So you can discern the proper information from the Internet, if you have a good mental filter your brain ie your brain, and the internet's amazing. But, you know, if you don't, then you end up with the previous administration? Ah, well, I had no idea that the just so once again, mind my ignorance, I had no idea that that would happen. I thought, you know, I think threw me off is I had a feeling it would happen if I added a lot, but because it said just add three drops. That'd be okay. No, you don't know why they write it on the bottle. Don't do it. They didn't write that on the bottom, but they should make it bigger. I know. Like on the front. Yeah, man. I think about suing the company. See, I don't support that. I believe society's got to take responsibility for their own foolishness. It's, you know, it's like, the same reason. If it's the same reason, if you write flammable on something you're like, Well, if I only use a little bit, it'll be okay. And you still blow something up. That's yeah, but how was I supposed to know that Flambeau and inflammable are the same thing. Because you speak English. And in order to speak the language, you have to understand the meaning of the words that are used. And or, you know, read English I hope, I hope if you're literate and you speak the language, then you should know what the words mean. Especially if you're going to be handling handling inflammable and flammable things. Maybe you know, if you don't know what they mean and don't play with them fair game instructions, I give my five year old so since I used all of my paper towels, and mop and T shirts to clean you guys, we don't we don't have head above poxy towels or mops, we still only have t shirts and hoodies if you want to buy the most expensive mop you ever bought. And you can buy yourself a hoodie and T shirt, tie it to a stick and, and mop up your kitchen. Or you could just wash your dishes like a normal person. And you know, do that in your head above a bankruptcy shirt and we're also like a normal person, but use it however you want. Whatever you do, just make sure you go into Bible that's that's the important part. Make sure you get the shirt whether you want to use it to you know, keep your keep your your your chesticles covered or if you want to use it to you know, clean your tires. That makes no difference to me. Really no like no, not bamboozled by anything like fake album release. By the end No, they said the detox was coming out and you were like yeah Now I knew that was never coming in. I talked about it too much. Now I don't because I don't believe anything. I I'm not I'm skeptical by nature. So whatever I read on the internet, I assume is a lie until I've, you know, validated it eight to 10 times and even then I'm like, I know they're probably still wrong. And then like a month later, once it's been a confirmed fact, well, I guess they were at, right. But I don't I don't trust the internet. I don't just people and people made the internet. So you know, by the transitive property, I can't trust the internet. I'll tell them you know, I don't trust social media. It Off looks its own that the internet it's just irresponsible children's internet. It's but you know, it's all the same thing. You can't be on social media without an internet connection. So fair. It's, it's it's the internet. And that's, that's that's why I don't trust it. Because half the stuff people get half of the information people say they get they get from social media, they don't even go and they don't even take to the trouble of skimming Wikipedia. They just bust open the Facebook or the Instagrams. And they're like, Ah, well, these three people said their posts, so it must be true. I'm not even gonna look on snopes.com to see if it's actually legit. Yeah, you got to go to this bar to get you the real facts. That is also a real website. Snopes. Huh. Yeah, I'm sure it is. You know, Marcus's main takeaway from this, as I stand on the soapbox over here is to not make a word is to let the viewers know or listeners rather, you know, we all make mistakes. And if you happen to make the same mistake I did of adding soap to your dishwasher, I'm pretty sure they won't do all you have to do is listen to the show spa down to comment down from your local Home Depot or home improvement store and they'll be able to take care of it. I don't think they give massages at Home Depot. I'm just trying to help people out. That way. They don't make the same mistake I did. Well, if you're helping them out by telling them to go to a Home Depot and ask for a massage. If they go into Home Depot bring you the bottle. I don't want to go to the spot. You don't you know the moral of the story is follow the instructions on the bottle. That way if it backfires, and you can sue the company, and you you know you don't have to do anything like well, I did what the Bible said. And now my house is on fire. So I want three new houses, please. And you might get four. And would you you can also get yourself like four hoodies, you got all that extra money I'm saying so head on over to the website, follow the instructions. And and you'll be fine. Otherwise, we'll end up like Marcus going to the spa trying to mop things up with t shirts and and some such foolishness. So but either way I got you right if you need if you need t shirts to cover your body, you need teachers to cover your floor. This is your one stop shop for cotton supplies, I suppose. But yeah, just it's real simple people. If you're literate, then follow the instructions. It's not that complicated. I don't know why. Maybe that's the moral of the story, don't overcomplicate things, right, keep it simple. If you are provided instructions, follow them. And that that abdicates responsibility. That's not your fault, you were provided with instructions, you followed them, it did not work. It is the people that provided you with set instructions fall. But if you know, you go call audible. You go off script. Now Now it's your fault. We told you not to do that you have no case. And you have to pay your lawyer fees. So now not only is your kitchen full of soap, but you're in debt. So you could have just, you know, wash the dishes, paper plates, go on the target, there's all kinds of solutions, other than going against what the instructions say, you know, that's that would be my advice, follow instructions. Unless unless you know otherwise, and even then you should probably follow the instructions. Yeah, you're often wrong. Unless, of course you listen to me, in which case, you know, brilliant well done. And on that note, I thank you for listening this long if you do, but you should probably go do something else. Because I'm done talking. See you guys next, follow instructions. That's why they have them. And there's so many instructions. You got caution, fire warning, and then they even do if you can't read, there'll be like a little baby drowning upside down. Or like electrical up lightning bolt on somebody's hand like they got they have picture instructions for the like, impressively dim witted. So there's no excuse just fine, even if you can, I thought initially you had to be able to read but now that I'm thinking about it, you don't have to be able to read if you can see and understand pictures, then you can likely follow the instructions. So you know just use your eyes and your brain and you'll be alright. Don't forget to use your ears and listen to me